Top 10 Tips for New Students
By Douglas Schmidt
10. Your tuition does not get you a free masseuse, no matter what that guy in the library says.
9. You don’t have to be a science major to experiment in college.
8. If you have to leave a lecture to use the restroom, it's considered polite to tell your prof how long you'll be gone and what you'll be doing.
7.Theater majors, be sure to audition for “Joseph and the Monochrome Trousers.” What could be more fun than a three-hour musical about Dockers?
6. Your tuition pays your professors’ salaries, so you’re basically their boss. Make sure to remind them of this
5. Art majors, remember that artists never sell paintings until after they’re dead. Of course, if you’re really impatient, you can start selling paintings this weekend…
4.Only take classes from professors who are listed in the phonebook. That way, when you get back your grades, you know where they live.
3.If you’re running late for class, you can save time by doing several things at once. While you’re taking your shower, you can also shave, brush your teeth, and blow-dry your hair.
2. If you’re really running late, it’s OK to come to class in your pajamas. However, you might want to rethink the onesie.
1. College is a great time to expose yourself to new cultures. First, get a trench coat…
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